is mandatory to reach the higher levels of social success.
Schttrj, if you've taken the actions I suggested you take,
then you are already learning this skill. You are leading
yourself into a new direction by collecting new experiences.
Leadership is first evident in how YOU choose to live.
If you are able to LEAD your own life (aka: autonomously),
this will directly translate into leadership skills with women,
socially, at work,etc.
If you live your life as a RESPONSE to outer stimuli, you are
a FOLLOWER by definition.
Can you see that? Pretty important...
Without a clear understanding of that, not even Tony Robbins can
help you...
Autonomy is a well-covered topic by me, and if you are
reading this and have no idea what I am talking about, be sure
to peruse my blog's archive and read more.
Or, just grab yourself a copy of my "How To Get A Girlfriend"
ebook ;-)
http://www.how-to-get-a-
What I want to specifically cover here though is the art on
becoming a leader socially - which is critical, since meeting
women 99% of the time happens in a social setting.
Being a leader socially immediately puts you in a position of power.
Here's how...
If you really want to expand your social circle (and therefore
meet new people... new *women*), you will have to take the lead
and make it happen.
Your friends may or may not be interested in meeting new people.
Your friends may or may not be interested on growing out of
their small comfort zone.
That is why it is so important for you to be willing to go out alone - particularly if it is something you really want to see, or experience.
You heard me right - GO OUT ALONE.
If you are willing to practice these actions I've prescribed
in this Master Class series, you will NEED to go out alone.
I did it. Any guy who is good at this is willing to head out
and practice alone.
It doesn't have to be all night, but you will need to socialize
on a regular basis to learn how to present yourself well to women.
If you absolutely insist upon going out with another guy, try
to find someone who is as interested in learning these skills
as you are. OK?
What I don't want to happen to you is to head out with your old
friends, and to have them influence you back into your old self.
Better to go out without all of those old anchors attached.
Another way to learn social leadership is to organize events
and outings for your social circle.
I used to have a loft in Brooklyn, and would throw monthly
parties as a way to expand my social circle. After every party,
I would have new numbers of women that I eventually dated or
invited to the next party.
Want to know the easiest way to meet women at a party?
THROW the party...and simply introduce yourself to everyone as
you mingle with:
"So, are you all enjoying the party tonight? Just wanting to
be sure everyone is having a good time"
With those sweet and simple words, you will covertly signal to
people that it is YOUR party they are attending.
If they are having fun, they will WANT to know your name...
Had I not taken the lead, and gone through the effort
of making these events happen, I would have never met these
women. And it was SO EASY too...
Also, I made countless new friends in the process.
Another fringe benefit to throwing parties is that when you
are out meeting new people in other environments, you have
an automatic way of keeping in touch with them -
"Hey, I am throwing a party next month, give me your email
address and I'll send you an invite".
All of these new people show up to your party, and
now you are on your home turf, meeting new people.
Again, everyone wants to meet you because it is your party!
I understand that you may not have the space to throw a party,
but most people are able to throw dinner parties, right?
Here is an idea - throw a dinner party, and ask each friend
to bring someone completely new who will not know the other
people there.
I used to do this a lot, and it always makes for an exciting
evening...PLUS, you get to expand your social circle with
NO ADDITIONAL EFFORT.
That's the best way to do it!
Develop a theme around the dinner. I remember one dinner party I
threw was based on a Mediterranean theme, and another was an
evening with different 'stews' from around the world.
Use your imagination and have fun with it.
Again, this is a great way to meet new people. Feel free to
confide in your female friends that they are more than welcome
to bring their single friends along.
Lastly, if you are totally out of ideas, throw a party in
another person's space.
Ask your friends, who happen to have the killer house in the
center of town, if they would mind if you threw a dinner party
at their house.
You will manage the invites, the decor, and the clean-up, while
everyone invited will bring a dish to the night. All they have
to do is get dressed and have a good time.
If the party is going to be big, get some friends to help you out.
The basic rule of thumb is to have one person helping you for
every ten guests.
So, if you can only find three other friends to help you with
the party, be sure to have no more than thirty people attend - this
is supposed to be fun, right?
Ultimately, you want to become the "go-to" guy for what's
happening.
I regularly get people together - from all corners
of my life - and head out to do something fun/new/interesting
/cool here in New York City.
Oh, and I don't care where you live - there is ALWAYS something
new and cool to do. Use your imagination (a very attractive
trait to women btw...)
I simply send an email, and let everyone know what "we're" doing.
I will typically get around 20% of people who are available
and interested.
These friends very often ask if they can bring someone, which
I of course encourage.
My girlfriend and I often go out on the weekends
with a group of around 10 friends in tow.
It is always more fun with others, and it is a great way to
meet new people.
If you use your imagination, and take the lead, there is no
way you can be stopped from expanding your social circle.
Seriously Schttrj - if you really want to be successful
with women, this is THE skill (which is why I save it for the
end).
Becoming the leader of your social circle is the FASTEST way
to meet quality, attractive women who have similar interests
as you.
You could do 30 cold approaches/week, and meet maybe 1 per month
with whom you can form a solid connection.
By expanding your social circle, and meeting new women in this
way, your chances of meeting new and interesting women are WAY
higher.
Again, be intelligent about this, and save yourself HOURS
of your life.
So, that's 10 of 10 Schttrj...whew...
I sure hope you got something positive and useful from this
series. Dare I say, if you took the actions I prescribe, you
DID get A LOT out of this series.
Now, back to the point I made earlier about making these new
actions into HABITS.
The ONE element to lasting change is ongoing effort.
I'm sure you agree with that.
So, a question I had to eventually ask myself was - how can I
MAINTAIN all of this?
I needed more support, more help, more guidance.
Without it, this would just become another "thing" I started
and never finished.
(see: 6-minute Abs, French lessons, Spanish lessons, weight-
lifting, tango lessons...)
This was WAY more important than being able to bench press
200 lbs (haha...like I was ever CLOSE to that...but, I digress).
Well, I save this piece of information until the end because
it's a serious offer.
You see, when I came back from Project Hollywood years ago,
I made a few recordings of what I had learned.
My buddy Sickboy (Mike) contributed to these recording too.
Well, I want to make them available to you...but first, you've
got to understand something.
You see, these recordings are slightly controversial.
I mean that, you wouldn't want your sister to hear them.
(I sure as hell don't want my girlfriend hearing them!)
Why, you ask?
If you've read Neil's book "The Game" you should know why...
BUT, I want you to hear these because I KNOW they work and
everything I recorded HELPED me tremendously.
In fact, some of these tactics are directly responsible for
where I am today.
Many of them are translated into the skills I just discussed
with you, and many others are in my ebook.
But, ALL of them, down to the last inflection I used in the
highest-octane clubs in the world...are in these recordings
Seriously.
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